Jokes
Two blondes are on opposite sides of a lake.
One blonde yells to the other, "How do you get to the other side?"
"You are on the other side," the other blonde yells back.
One blonde yells to the other, "How do you get to the other side?"
"You are on the other side," the other blonde yells back.
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Top Ten Reasons Why The Computer Industry Is Finally Opening Up To Women
I. It's easier for a woman to "turn on" a computer
II. Women don't have motherboard fixations.
III. Women are much better at FDISK-ing a hard drive
IV. When lost on the Internet, women are willing to ask for directions.
V. Women can communicate gossip and rumors quicker than the fastest modem.
VI. Only women (I think) can marry Bill Gates.
VII. Women see a 14 inch monitor they think it's a 14 incher and not a 20.
VIII. Women have bigger SMART drives.
IX. Women don't think with their joysticks.
X. Women actually read installation manuals.
I. It's easier for a woman to "turn on" a computer
II. Women don't have motherboard fixations.
III. Women are much better at FDISK-ing a hard drive
IV. When lost on the Internet, women are willing to ask for directions.
V. Women can communicate gossip and rumors quicker than the fastest modem.
VI. Only women (I think) can marry Bill Gates.
VII. Women see a 14 inch monitor they think it's a 14 incher and not a 20.
VIII. Women have bigger SMART drives.
IX. Women don't think with their joysticks.
X. Women actually read installation manuals.
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A blonde gets an opportunity to fly to a nearby country. She has never
been on an airplane anywhere and was very excited and tense. As soon
as she boarded the plane, a Boeing747, she started jumping in excitement,
running over seat to seat and starts shouting, "BOEING! BOEING!!
BOEING!!! BO....."
Annoyed by the goings on, the Pilot comes out and shouts "BE SILENT!"
There was pin-drop silence everywhere and everybody is looking at the
blonde and the angry Pilot. She stared at the pilot in silence for a
moment, concentrated really hard, and all of a sudden started shouting,
"OEING! OEING! OEING! OE...."
been on an airplane anywhere and was very excited and tense. As soon
as she boarded the plane, a Boeing747, she started jumping in excitement,
running over seat to seat and starts shouting, "BOEING! BOEING!!
BOEING!!! BO....."
Annoyed by the goings on, the Pilot comes out and shouts "BE SILENT!"
There was pin-drop silence everywhere and everybody is looking at the
blonde and the angry Pilot. She stared at the pilot in silence for a
moment, concentrated really hard, and all of a sudden started shouting,
"OEING! OEING! OEING! OE...."
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A man walks in to an auto store and askes the blonde cashier where the turtle wax is. the blonde says,"i'm sorry sir, but we don't sell pet supplies."
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Once, a blonde decided to ride a horse. She was riding quite pleasantly on a trail in a field until the horse speeded up.
He was going faster and faster, and soon she felt herself slipping. Her head was just about to hit the ground... Then the Wal Mart manager ran to turn off the horsey ride.
He was going faster and faster, and soon she felt herself slipping. Her head was just about to hit the ground... Then the Wal Mart manager ran to turn off the horsey ride.
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A blonde was walking along, when she looked up to observe a bird flying overhead. Suddenly, the bird drops a load when it was directly over her.
The blonde says, "Good thing I had my mouth open, or that would've hit me right in the face!"
The blonde says, "Good thing I had my mouth open, or that would've hit me right in the face!"
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A blonde was driving down the highway to Disneyland when he saw a sign that said "DISNEYLAND LEFT".
After thinking for a minute, he said to herself "oh well!" and turned around and drove home.
On his way home, the same blonde drove past another sign that said "CLEAN RESTROOMS EIGHT MILES".
By the time he drove eight miles, he had cleaned 43 restrooms.
After thinking for a minute, he said to herself "oh well!" and turned around and drove home.
On his way home, the same blonde drove past another sign that said "CLEAN RESTROOMS EIGHT MILES".
By the time he drove eight miles, he had cleaned 43 restrooms.
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A Blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom.
She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I`ve kidnapped you."
She then wrote a note saying, "I`ve kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan
tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, Blonde."
The Blonde then taped the note to the kid`s shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents.
The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree.
The blonde opened the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow Blonde?"
She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I`ve kidnapped you."
She then wrote a note saying, "I`ve kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan
tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, Blonde."
The Blonde then taped the note to the kid`s shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents.
The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree.
The blonde opened the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow Blonde?"
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