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Blonde Jokes

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A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer (also a blonde). The cop asked to see the blonde's driver's license.

She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated. "What does it look like?" she finally asked.

The policewoman replied, "It's square and it has your picture on it." The driver finally found a square mirror, looked at it, and handed it to the policewoman. "Here it is," she said. The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, "Okay, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop."
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One day this cop pulls over a blonde for speeding. The cop gets out of his car and asks the blonde for her license.

"You cops should get it together. One day you take away my license and the next day you ask me to show it."
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Two bowling teams, one all blondes, one all bruneettes, charter a double-decker bus for a weekend bowling tournament in Atlantic City.
The brunette team rides on the bottom level of the bus, the blonde team rides on the top level.

The brunette team, down below, is wooping it up and having a great time until one of them realizes she doesn't hear anything from the blondes upstairs, and she decides to investigate.

When the brunette reaches the top, she finds the blonde team staring straight ahead at the road, frozen in fear, clutching the seats in frount of them with white knuckles.

"Whats going on up here?" asks the brunette. "We're having a great time downstairs!"
"Yeah," screams a terrified blonde, "but you've got a driver!"
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A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open, exposing one of her breasts.
A nearby policeman approaches her and remarks, "Ma'am, are you aware that I could cite you for indecent exposure?"

"Why, officer?" asks the blonde.

"Because your blouse is open and your breast is exposed."

"Oh my goodness," exclaims the blonde, "I left my baby on the bus!"
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A blonde, brunette and a redhead run to the top of a burning building. Below, a few firefighters are holding a blanket telling the redhead to jump.

When the redhead jumps the firefighters snatch the blanket away and she hits the concrete.

When the firefighters ask the brunette to jump she jumps and again they pull the blanket away.

When the firefighters ask the blonde to jump she replies, "I don't trust you, so just put the blanket down and back away."
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A blonde, a red head and a brunette were competing in the English Channel Breast Stroke Competition.

The redhead won and the brunette came in second. However, there was no sign of the final contestant. Hours and hours went by
causing grave concern and worry. Just as everyone was losing hope, the blonde finally arrived.

The crowd was extremely happy and relieved to see her. They embraced the young girl as she came ashore. After all of the excitement died down, she leaned over to the judge and whispered, "I hate to be a bad loser, but I think those other girls used their arms."
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A policeman pulled a blonde over after she'd been driving the wrong way on a one-way street.
Cop: "Do you know where you were going?"

Blonde: "No, but wherever it is, it must be bad 'cause all the people were leaving."
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There are three people: a blonde named Stacy, a red-head named Mary, and a guy named Jack.

One day Mary says "I think we should rob a bank." And everyone agrees.

So the next week after much planning they all set it up. "Now remember me and Mary are going to circle around for two minures, got it?" Says Jack, "Okay." Says Stacy.

They drive away and two minutes pass and they come back. Stacy hasn't come out. 3 minutes pass, 4 minutes pass, 10 minutes pass, and after 11 minutes Stacy comes runing out with a safe that has been tied up and a guard with his pants down chasing after her. Stacy jumps in the car and they drive off.

Imidietly Mary says, "I told you to blow the safe and tie up the guard!!!"
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One day, a blonde named Sally was putting together a puzzle. She was really stumped and very frustrated, so she decided to ask her husband for help.

"It's supposed to be a tiger!" Sally cried.

"Honey," said Dan, "Put the Frosted Flakes back in the box!"
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